Blood Parade
by Day of Diana
Summary: Maka is given the task of re-habilitating Asura to work for the world, not against it. But being in close quarters with a former enemy is difficult work. It can make a girl rather uncomfortable, you know? Especially when the guy is... kind of hot.


_Hi everyone! I'm launching a new series, but this is my first fic for Soul Eater! I hope you enjoy it, and that you get your fill of the cracky goodness that is Asura/Maka by the end! (p.s. There will also be some other pairings, but they won't matter once this story gets into full swing) _

_I love you guys! . And I love Soul Eater! Peace, yo!_

_This fanfic is dedicated to Z-Raid (and no, I'm not affiliated with her in any way; I just think she's awesome). Seriously. She's the one who got me on this crack train in the first place. Check out her DeviantArt account, and her Fanfiction account on here. She's hilarious. _

**DISCLAIMER: **_Warning! You are about to embark on an adventure of the crackiest kind! Please know that all of these sexy characters are not owned by me! Thankies!_

B+++++++++++++++++++++++++P

"Oh dear. This is a grave matter that must be remedied at once. But first... who shall I call to come take on this serious case? Oh, and some tea! And mochi! That always perks me right up after dismaying intel!"

The Lord of Death bustled about, bouncing on his coat-tails repeatedly in order to hop around the small kitchen that had just appeared in the middle of the first Death Room.

"Mmm-hmm. Tea, tea. Oh, I love tea. Why does JB like coffee so much? Tea is so much better than coffee. Better for your soul, I do say. Yeah, yeah."

He put a pot of green tea on to boil, then rummaged about in the pantry for some mochi.

"Which mochi goes best with green tea? Peanut, plum, purin, pineapple... what do you think, Sid? Stein? Spirit?"

The three other people just stood silently a little outside the space of the kitchen. They all stared with no small amount of amusement at their god, who was happily humming the tune to "I'm a little tea-pot" under his breath while selecting a package of cherry blossom mochi.

"Please, have a seat, all of you! You won't be able to drink and eat and be merry while standing up!" Shinigami said to his subordinates. "Besides, it's bad for your digestion."

A low, fancy lacquered table appeared in the middle of the kitchen. Along with it, four maroon cushions poofed into existence. Shinigami continued to flit around the kitchen, checking the tea and plating the mochi on tiny green dishes.

Very slowly, all with poker faces, Sid, Stein and Spirit walked over to the table and seated themselves on the cushions. They were used to their Lord's quirks and ability to remain unruffled while under high pressure. They waited.

Soon Shinigami served them. The food selection was very artfully arranged on the table. Spirit made a comment about it, and Shinigami played it off as something that his son had shown him in a magazine. They went about quietly enjoying their afternoon tea when Shinigami said quite suddenly, "Are you sure it's true?"

Sid and Spirit did spit takes. They had almost forgotten that the four of them were really here for something actually very important. Shinigami tended to have a calming effect on everybody once he'd established control of the situation. Death seemed to do that.

Stein, however, had not once let his guard down. He immediately responded with, "Yes. It's very serious. If we don't do something about it now, the problem will only get out of hand." He then took a sip of his tea.

"Lord Shinigami!" Spirit exclaimed, mopping up his spilt tea with his tie. "Excuse me, but you must stop treating these situations so lightly! If we weren't here to tell you about something, or handle it for you, what in the world would you do?"

Shinigami handed Spirit a napkin, which the death scythe gratefully accepted. Shinigami then said, "I suppose something would come along to take care of it."

Spirit let out a frustrated noise. Sid took a napkin too and said, "Pardon me as well, but surely, you must have a plan Z for when absolutely everything goes awry? We can't always be here for you."

Shinigami laughed light-heartedly. "I'm aware of that. But you guys are really reliable. I think I can count on you for almost anything."

"That being said," Stein drawled, "I'm not sure what we're going to do about this. Like I mentioned before, this is one of the worst possible things that could happen. We need to take action."

Shinigami swallowed the rest of his tea and picked up a mochi ball. The other three men looked away respectfully when Shinigami flipped up his mask and popped the mochi into his mouth. He then resettled his mask and chewed thoughtfully.

"Well," Shinigami began. Sid, Stein and Spirit turned back to him and leaned forward in anticipation of their god's plan. "...What do you guys think we should do?"

This question was followed by a trio of palms smacking foreheads.

After that, Stein took over. He adjusted his glasses on his nose and launched into a detailed outline of what he thought was the best for the circumstances Death City was now in.

When he was finished, the other three added their own thoughts and revisions were made. Sid jotted down notes while Shinigami and Spirit enthusiastically waved their arms about, describing different facets of the plan. Stein mostly commented on things that he thought weren't going to work and then suggested better solutions.

Finally, after five hours of debating, drinking tea, eating mochi, and smoking cigarettes (Stein's and Spirit's doing) the preliminary planning stages were done. They probably needed to take a short break before working on it again, to review it and spot more potential flaws, and bring in some other opinions, but all in all it wasn't bad for a day's work.

However, they had precious little time. They needed to initiate the plan now; to wait any longer would endanger all of Death City.

And so, each with a task in mind, they set vigorously to work to implement the plan.

B+++++++++++++++++++++++++P

Maka Albarn stepped out of the shower and wrung her hair free of excess water. She walked confidently over to the mirror and began combing out the tangles that the conditioner was supposed to smooth out.

Today was an important day for her and her partner, Soul. They had to look their best for the presentation.

When she finished drying herself off, she tied her hair up in her usual high ponytails and, wrapping a towel around herself, unlocked the bathroom door. Making sure her towel was in place, she tiptoed out of the bathroom and down the hall to Blair's room. Soul was probably still asleep. He wasn't an early riser.

Maka quietly knocked on Blair's door. There was no sound from within.

"Blair?" The sandy-blonde haired girl called softly. "Blair? You have to make breakfast today."

There was still no answer. Blair was usually pretty good at getting up at ungodly hours to pester Soul and occasionally Maka. It was kind of odd that she was not popping her head out to complain about having to make breakfast. Unless...

Maka pulled on the knob of the door. It opened.

"Blair?" Whispered Maka, peeking around the edge of the frame.

The witch's room was, appropriately, small. Since her real form was a cat, Maka had just given her a spare closet with some toys, water, a litter box and a cat bed to sleep in. But sometimes when Blair wanted to really stretch out, she would transform into her human figure and try to sleep in Soul's bed. The scythe had banned Blair from his room long ago, but the little cat burglar still managed to unlock his door and sneak in at night.

So Maka wasn't at all surprised when Blair wasn't curled up in her cat bed. Nor was she on the top shelf of the closet, which she sometimes liked to sleep on.

"Damnit, Blair." Maka sighed, and closed the door.

With a shake of her head and her temper already starting to flare, Maka marched none too quietly further down the hall to Soul's room.

"Blair! Open up! You have to make breakfast today," she said loudly at the door. There was a sleepy groan on the other side. Maka tried the handle, but it wouldn't move. The door was locked.

Maka listened for movement inside, and she could hear rustling of bed covers. Then the shuffle of feet on the floor. Then a lock turning inside tumblers.

The door clicked open.

"Bl-" Maka started.

But it was Soul, in his red and black pajamas, hair tousled and mouth wide open with shiny saliva running down his chin. So he drooled in his sleep. Not a pretty picture.

"Maka. It's six a.m. What are you doing?"

"Um, well, the presentation is today so I'm getting ready..."

Soul crossed his arms and put on a grumpy face. "I see. Then why'd you have to wake me up?"

"Because I think Blair's in your room."

His eyes widened momentarily and Maka thought she saw the beginnings of a drop of blood in one of his nostrils. Soul turned around and went back into his room, looking about. Maka followed.

After a minute, it was clear Blair was not present. Soul sat down on his bed. "She's not here. Do you need her for something?"

"Yeah," Maka said, fidgeting. "She needs to make breakfast because I'm getting ready for the presentation."

"Oh. Did you try-"

"Yes. She's not in her clo-, I mean, room."

"Hm. Maybe she's out hunting." Soul pulled his feet up and laid down, resting his head on the pillow.

Maka sat down at his desk, hugging her towel to her chest. "Does she really scavenge? I thought we were feeding her pretty well..."

Soul turned his head to the side, facing the wall instead of his partner. "I dunno. We've been living with her for six months, but I don't really know all that much about her, other than she's sexy~"

Maka threw a book at him. There was a satisfying clonking sound.

"Ouch," Soul hissed, rubbing his head and glaring at her. "I was just stating the facts. Cool guys don't lie."

Maka felt a vein throb in her forehead. She closed her eyes and clenched her fists. "_Cool guys _don't nosebleed all over sexy females every twenty minutes."

"Aha," Soul murmured, and he rolled his eyes away from Maka. "You just admitted it. Blair is one sexy kitty."

"Shut up!" Maka growled, and hopped off of Soul's desk chair. "I'm leaving."

"Good," Soul yawned. "Maybe now I'll have some peace."

Maka stomped out of his room and was tempted to slam the door, but she didn't want it to fall off its hinges... again. Instead she shut it with a very decisive snap, and was satisfied with that. Now to find where Blair was.

After getting dressed and then poking her head into her own closet, the small living room, and kitchen/dining room, Maka gave up on the sneaky cat. Maybe she really was out hunting mice, though Maka doubted it. In fact, Maka had never seen Blair eat anything but the food that Soul and Maka prepared. The scythe meister couldn't even recall Blair eating a single piece of the expensive cat food she had bought for her. Then again, who would eat cat food when human food tasted so much better?

"Blair, you're so annoying. Where are you?" Maka took eggs, cheese and sprigs of parsley out of the refrigerator. She blew air past her bangs and began cracking eggs into a skillet. "Hmph. I'm blaming you if we're late for our presentation."

As she set about making omelets for herself and her partner, she could hear Soul moving around the small apartment. He had probably forgotten what day it was. Well, she hadn't. And it was her duty to remind him.

"Soul! Hurry up! We're supposed to be there by 8 o'clock!" Maka yelled over her shoulder, while deftly sprinkling cheese onto the bubbling yolks in the pan.

"It's still early, we'll make it in time. And don't shout; I don't want our neighbors to be bothered by you." Soul padded into the kitchen, towel wrapped around his waist and hair dripping.

Maka flipped the semi-cooked omelets over in the skillet. She avoided looking directly at him while she scolded him. "You can't just come in here half-naked. It's almost time to leave."

Soul gave her back a sheepish grin. "My clothes aren't ready yet. Can you iron my slacks? They're my nicest pair of pants and they're wrinkled."

She sighed and carefully slid their breakfast onto two plates. She handed one plate to him, and then set her own down on the table. They ate silently and quickly.

When they were finished, Soul cleared up the mess from breakfast and Maka went down to the cleaning supply closet to grab the ironing board.

In the half an hour before they both were to stand before the Committee of Homeland Security, the Warden of Death City's Jailhaus, and Lord Shinigami himself, Soul found Blair sleeping in the cupboard. There was an incident in which Blair transformed and Soul's nose gushed blood, but Maka managed to chase the cat out of the apartment before too much damage could be done. Then, with only ten minutes to catch the monorail, they both decided to jump on Soul's motorbike instead and high-tail it to the second of the three Death Rooms.

Yes. It was an important day for Soul Eater Evans and Maka Albarn. They both knew that.

But what they didn't know was... that day would take on a whole new meaning of importance. For them. For their friends, for their family, and for their hometown of Death City. But most of all, it would change the course of history for the entire world.

Asura was rising again.

B+++++++++++++++++++++++++P

_Ah! A-su-ra! A-su-ra! Isn't he dreamy, you guys? In the English dub, he sounds like a rapist. He's climbin' in your window, he's snatching your people up..._

_Please review. _

_:) Bye! See you next chapter. _


End file.
